Final Critique

– more screencap

– music too loud in spots

– make sure people know the game footage is our game

– add more quintin

– don’t change a thing

– Lower thirds for Casey

– lower punching noises

– constantly running clock/hours

– conflict good

– beginning audio clipping

– transitions awkward (fade to black)

– more exciting music in parts w/ conflict

– end credits at beginning?

– ken burns timelapse at end

– vary music more?

– bring us in to world more gently (too foreign to others, too obvious to us)

– music overdramatic at times (endings)

– expected it to be humorous/ too somber

– character development & struggle

– make it better

Possible Intro and Ending?


Our documentary will start one hour before the end of the game jam. The opening shot will be an over the shoulder of view of Jason or I playing a close to finished build of the game. While we’re playing, there will be a voiceover talking about what’s left to finish in the game, and how little time we have to finish it. This will establish a conflict quickly, and give the viewer something interesting to watch while we discuss the game jam. After showing the gameplay with voiceover from our interview for a bit, we’ll cut from game footage and show us, the people talking and making the game, continuing the interview.


However the game jam goes, good or bad, the documentary will end on a high note of showing the finished game being played, and an interview of Jason and I talking about doing more game jams. Outside of the class, Jason and I have decided to do more jams, and whether or not this one goes well, it’ll be a learning experience for everyone involved.


What’s the narrative spine of our piece?

Two people accomplishing a task against all odds.

What are your main characters? What are your plans for getting footage besides boring talking head shots?

Jason, Cooper, and Quintin. We have screen recordings of the entire development process, gameplay video of the finished game, timelapse of the apartment across the entire event, b-roll of computer parts moving and booting up etc..

How is conflict driving your story?

We’re undertaking a really big task, with a really tight deadline, and are inexperienced in game development.

What kind of change do you wish to unfold in your piece?

We will show a game being made at every stage of the development process, so a big subject of the piece will constantly be changing.

What’s the inciting incident and point of entry in your story?

The Ludum Dare game jam is a 72 hour contest to complete what is normally a 3+ year task.

What issues do you foresee having to make your piece visually strong?

We need to avoid having too much video that is just us typing on the computer without any exposition or development of the story.